My Four Boys

It went kinda like this:
  Me:   Van we are going to the doctor for your 3 year check up and Gunners 4 month check up.
  Van:  No!  I hate the doctor I am not going!!
  Me:   Forcing him into the car...not a pretty site and it was defiantly not peaceful. 
  Medical Assistant:  Will you step on the scale we just need your weight.
  Van: No!  Arms folded and feet not moving
  Me:  Picked him up and placed him on the scale.
  MA: Okay lets get your height.
  Me:  Once again picking him up and putting his non-cooperative self against the wall.
  Van: Yelling at the poor MA...you messed up my hair.
  Me:  thinking...really your hair?! It has never not been in a Mohawk since the day you were born!
Finally making it into the room. 
  MA:  Okay lets get your blood pressure.
  Van:  I hate that! 
  MA:  We have to do it (she was really patient with the beast of a child).
  MA:  Happily leaves the room as fast as she can.
Doc comes in checks out Gunner and on to Van....
  Doc:  Van do you know your colors?
  Van:  NO!  Then gives in and tells all the colors in the room, counts for him, and sings his ABC's.
  Doc:  Okay Van hop up it is your turn.
  Van:  Fine but you are NOT taking my pants off and you are NOT putting the stick in my mouth!
  Doc:  No I am not taking your pants off and if you open your mouth big I won't use a stick.
  Van:  Actually cooperates for a minute then gets off the table and starts walking out while saying I am done I am going home now and opens the door.
  Doc:  How are you getting home?
  Van:  The steering wheel.
  Me:   No you are not get back in here.
  Van:  Oh I need the keys.
  Me:   You can't have them they are hidden.
  Van:  Yes I can you hide them in the diaper bag.
  Me:   About to kill him...get him back in and back on track..
  Doc:  Can you petal your trike?
  Van:  I am big I have a big bike not a trike and I don't wear a helmet and I love to crash into all the trash cans!
  Me:   For reals did he just say that?!  Then I ask about sedating Van for his dentist appointment. 
  Van:  Interrupts and tells the Doc... I hate the dentist I bite him!
  Doc:  Could not hold it in any more and just starts laughing.
It pretty much ends there....yeah right, I wish, on to the shots....
  Just use your imagination!  Any one want to go the the doctor with Van?!  It is a great experience!

Well Van, you are outspoken and full of fire but we love you!  Just for the books here is your info
Height:    3"5  50%
Weight:   34 solid pounds of muscle 75%